So, you’ve tied the knot, settled into your new home together, and survived your first holiday visit as newlyweds. Inevitably, amidst the festive cheer and the clinking of glasses, someone leans in and asks, "So, when are you two having kids?" Ah, the classic post-wedding interrogation that's as awkward as it is oddly normal. This question, often a nod to the old biblical call to "be fruitful and multiply," may bring a mix of emotions, whether you're eager to start a family or leaning towards being the cool 'Funcle' or the fabulous 'Rich Auntie'. Let’s unpack this!
What Kind of Parents Will You Be? Before the stork visits or you decide it might never visit, it’s crucial to discuss what kind of parents you want to be. Reflect on the parenting styles you grew up with, the aspects you admire and those you might want to do differently. What did your childhood look like, and how does that shape your vision for raising your own kids, or perhaps why you might choose not to?
Exploring All Avenues: Parenthood isn’t one-size-fits-all. For some, it might involve natural birth, for others, adoption, or fostering. And yes, becoming mentors or volunteering in children's programs can also be fulfilling ways to impart your wisdom and love without having children of your own. Every path is valid and valuable.
Choosing Not to Have Children: The decision not to have children is as significant as the decision to have them. This choice deserves as much respect and consideration. Whether it’s about personal preference, lifestyle choices, or other reasons, embracing the 'Rich Auntie' or 'Fun Uncle' life is as enriching and worthwhile. Plus, who doesn’t love spoiling a kid with fun adventures and then sending them home to their parents?
Blended Families: For those entering a marriage with children already in the picture, blending families is a journey of its own. It’s about creating a new unit that respects and cherishes the bonds with all children, whether biological or stepchildren, ensuring they feel valued and included.
Family planning is a deeply personal journey that should be navigated with care, openness, and a lot of heart. Whether you're mapping out a future with children or setting a course for a different kind of family life, remember, family is what you make it, and it doesn’t always have to be biological.
Feeling overwhelmed by the family planning pressure? Whether you’re exploring parenthood or embracing life without children, schedule a coaching session with me or join The Marriage Class cohort for more tools and insights. Let’s chart a course that honors your unique vision and values, ensuring your family life is everything you wish it to be.
XO,
Minister Sharnise